What’s in a title …

“Knighted by the Queen of England, Sir Big Eyes is recognised for his many years of unfaltering effort in defending the rights of the middle class worker”. Inter-Galaxy News Report dated …

From then on, whenever anyone, anywhere in the world writes a letter beginning with ‘Dear Sir’, you know it’s addressed to you. I mean, if they wanted to address it to John, they would have written ‘Dear John’ instead now, wouldn’t they?

Perhaps being a ‘Sir’ in Britain is quite a rare finding - by rare, I mean you don't hit one when you randomly throw a stone into a crowd. But over here in Malaysia, it seems that every Datuk Tom, Datuk Dick and Datuk Harry is a Tan Sri.

For the benefit of our foreign readers, Datuk (or Dato’, or Datuk Seri, or Dato’ Sri, or Datuk Wira … the list of titles and spelling variations goes on for perhaps almost as long as the recipients list itself) are titles given by the many sovereign rulers of each state in Malaysia. There are also titles given by the Federal Government.

Once, a long time ago (and I’m not talking from experience … wasn’t even born during this mythical era), these titles were few and scarce. Being a Datuk, or the higher Tan Sri (depending on the ranking of the title, of course), would mean that you have made significant contributions to the country. And by saying ‘to the country’, I mean to the people of the country. Years and years of unquestionable service and sacrifice. You get my drift.

Yes, I am making a big fuss about this because I don’t have a title myself. Nor do I expect to be conferred a title in the near future. But that’s beside the point – you simply don’t gripe about things that you already have, do you?

So, here we have it, thousands and thousands of Datuk’s. People who would probably get offended if you don’t call them by their proper title. Again for the benefit of our friends overseas, you should always greet a Datuk by using their titles, such as ‘Hello, Datuk …’ and not ‘Hello, Mr Eye …’ When writing, the title Datuk should always be preceded by at least the abbreviation of ‘Yang Berbahagia’ (meaning something like ‘the esteemed one’ or something like that … I’m not a translator you know). Of course, there are different prefixes to different types of Datuk’s. Keeping it simple, won’t go into that.

Now where was I? Oh yes, every Datuk Tom, Datuk Dick and Datuk Harry is now a Tan Sri.

By the rate its going, that would actually be the case. No more ‘Encik so-and-so’. This is our equivalent to ‘Mister’ … I can just imagine a re-branding exercise of Mr Muscle, the cleaning product, into Encik Muscle, or going by the trend, Datuk Muscle …

I’m not lashing out to those who have in the very recent past been conferred a title by the rulers of the land. Good for them. At least they are now on par with the rest of high society. The rest of us, the minority from where I see it, will just have to be happy with people calling us by our names … apart from ‘bro’ and ‘dude’ being the regular substitutes.

But as somebody (many bodies, actually) has pointed out in the media recently, the powers that be may just want to slide off the awards pedal for a wee bit. Have a look at the titles being given out. Perhaps more importantly, to whom they are given out to. There is such a thing as being too young. Not because of the age, really, but because of the amount of contribution given to the country to deserve such an award.

Not to pick on anyone, but this is a popular example: A certain young lady of below 25 years, international acclaim in dominating a particular sport. Now a Datuk. I wonder if this was given in recognition of contribution to King and Country ... making the internationals recognise that we are actually good at someting perhaps ...?

Another current example is: A certain relatively young sportsman, almost but not quite excellent performance in an international event of extreme high publicity. Will soon be made a Datuk. Again, putting us on the sports map of second best ...

These are good people, of course. Not questioning that!

But what of the many, many aged citizens who have given their all to helping others, fighting for worthy causes. What about the village leaders who fight to ensure their villages forest reserves remain intact? What about the teachers whose students grow up leading the country … who still remember their names long after they have passed?

Bow your heads in respect, fellow countrymen. Who are we to question the wisdom of our Masters?

Perhaps we should all get back to the good old times when a Datuk was somebody you could look up to for guidance. Not merely those who shine bright in the current light of day but have yet to prove their brilliance after nightfall.

Yes, by all means their current contributions should be celebrated. But there are other awards, that don’t carry such ‘honorific titles’. There are many more awards that reflect lesser contribution to society. USE THEM!

Anyway, at least the title ‘Tun’, perception-wise the highest title a commoner can receive, is still safe from the dangers of mass production. From what I’ve heard, there are only some 25 Tun’s in the country (or was that 50, but who’s counting). If this very minimal quota has been filled, a current ‘Tun’ would have to come to pass before the title is given to another. In my most humble opinion, this treatment of the title befits the status of the award to somebody with immeasurable commitment and sacrifice to their nation.

Now, that’s what I call a Title.